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1. Work out
Get up and get moving every single day. “We spend so long in our heads that we forget how our body feels or what it needs,” Errey says. Getting bogged down by work and responsibilities can numb the smells, feels, and emotions of everyday life with thoughtless motions and actions. “Exercising gets you right back into your mind and body, as well as releasing endorphins that give you that amazing physiological buzz.”
2. Change your posture
Breathe deep. Stand tall. Push your shoulders back. “Standing tall and strong has been shown to make you feel more assertive, which can give you a quick boost of confidence if you need it,” Errey says. Feeling like you have a more dominant presence can help inflate your self esteem, but don’t mistake this for anything other than a quick fix, Errey advises.
3. Do something scary
“Whether you’re looking to make a career change, face a big challenge, embark on a new relationship, or tackle a new project, trust yourself to take one step,” Errey advises. “That’s it. Then, when you’ve taken that step, trust yourself to take the next. You don’t know what’s going to happen ahead of time, so trust your ability to engage with the process rather than the outcome.” This is a great solution if you’re the type to back away from making decisions when it feels like everything hinges on them, or if you’re terrified of change. Instead of taking the plunge, change one or two things for a week, and see what happens. These small experiments can help you make an entire transformation.
4. Compete against yourself
The desire and obsession to fit in is suffocating, not to mention exhausting. “And fitting in isn’t a measure of success or popularity, it’s a measure of insecurity,” Errey explains. “Replace the urge to present yourself in a way that fits in with what others might expect, and replace it with the mantra you’ll do better work and have better relationships when you show up as yourself.” It’ll be difficult; we’re hardwired for comparison. But every time you look around and wonder how others got to be more successful than you, it will strip more and more of your confidence.
5. Strive for excellence
“Pursuing perfection is a spectacular way to ruin your life,” Errey says, point blank. You’ll be in a constant state of discontent because you’ll always feel like you’re not good enough. “Perfection is about doing everything you can to appease everyone else.” To rectify the thought process, accept your best and begin to accept you’re good enough without perfection in your life.
6. Accept you’re sometimes wrong
Always feel the need to prove you’re right? “Time to let that go,” Errey says. “It places your self-worth in the wrong place and drives you to pursue being right over being happy or fulfilled.”
7. Hang with the right crowd
Why would you ever want to surround yourself with people who say or make you feel like you’re not good enough and plummet your self-esteem? “It’s said that you become the average of the five people you spend the most time with, so look for friendships and relationships that make you feel free,” Errey says.
8. Embrace your fears
Fear is only present when there’s risk, change or opportunity. You’re no less a man for being afraid or experiencing fear, and it’s not something to be avoided or pushed away. “Avoiding fear is a super-smart way to kill your confidence, so reframe it as part of any meaningful endeavor and see it as an opportunity to step up, try something new, give it your best shot and maybe have a heap of fun.